How would I define success? Success is perfection. At least that’s what it meant to me a few years back. It was the constant “well-done” feedbacks to my perfectly neat notebooks or my unflawed GPA. It was the uninterrupted full marks, and the tall peaked A's on most of my report cards. The lane towards success was spotless. It was right then when I knew I had it as if I owned it. I thought I mastered it enough to call myself the chief. It was comfortable that I always expected it. And at some point, if I faced a hurdle, it was as if I lost it. The sense of fulfillment and excellence would slip away from my hands, and I would not be happy anymore.
The following feeling was crushing. And I start marking myself as a loser, like a neon sign over a pizza delivery car, bright and loud. All the troubling thoughts and demeaning emotions assemble together into a big complicated knot. This knot stays jammed inside my heart, and I can’t free it. It’s funny how easily I surrendered to it, how a number could control me like a switch.
It’s so unfortunate that I defined success in such narrow ways, as by academic achievements, as by up or down, black or white, rich or poor. I refused to believe that failure was part of it. I forgot how tumbling down just reminded me of the missing steps ahead of me. That it unclogged my vision, and I could clearly see my potential. My wants and needs. It reminded me of how the journey was more significant than the result. And there I found acceptance. I finally acknowledged my hard work and the aftermath, whether it was flawed, fair, or sound. That’s when I was content, and that’s when I knew I had it.
If I lingered on the thought that success was built on intellectual achievements, I would have missed the things that made life worthwhile. I wouldn't have learned that success could come in multiple forms. The success of establishing a family with happy children. The success of pursuing a hobby as a career, success in finding love, and providing for your people. As Angela Abraham once said, 'Notions of success depend entirely on what you believe the right goal is.'
So whatever purpose you set in life, trivial or vast, as long as you deliver it, it is by far considered success. It's about the genuine gratification that supplies your soul. It's all about you, you, and the way you want to take this road.